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01st Nov 2023

‘My husband doesn’t understand how much I work’

Anna Martin

husband wife fighting

Would you expect your husband to help out around the house?

Most people would especially when you both work full time and you’ve only recently had a baby.

Yet one woman seems to be at her wit’s end after months of carrying most of the workload, s0 she turned to Reddit for advice.

“My husband and I have not been seeing eye to eye lately. We have been together for 10 years and married for 4 months (3 days before our son was born),” she wrote.

“I have been getting frustrated because I feel like we are not a team in taking care of the house duties.

husband wife fighting

“We both work full-time jobs and I have been doing most of the house duties and mainly taking care of our son on weekdays after work and weekends unless I’m working weekends.”

Though she acknowledged that he does play with their son while she’s making dinner she added that if things aren’t finished up fast enough he’ll just leave for the gym.

Whenever she brings up how exhausted she is he tells her “how much he does for her”. Yet things are showing no signs of improvement.

“Lately he mentions he doesn’t know how much longer he can take it and is insinuating that he wants to divorce me,” the poster explained.

husband wife fighting

“I don’t know why he has been doing that when I am trying to make an effort to make things right with him like trying to stop getting frustrated and start to lose weight and get back to my old weight when I was 21.”

She concluded her post by asking her fellow Redditors if she is making too much of a big deal out of what she does in the home and expressing her fear of losing her marriage.

People couldn’t get over the fact the poster felt like she needed to lose weight for her husband and encouraged her to look after herself.

husband wife fighting

“Don’t let him shame you or make u feel guilty about your weight. Don’t believe that’s going to fix the problems you have mentioned. Either he grows a pair and becomes a parent and household keeper or it’s not going to work,” penned one person.

“Stop doing everything. If he’s hungry he can cook. In the evening, go to the gym. On the weekends, get out of the house. Do this until he starts complaining about housework. Then laugh and say ‘you get it now?'” commented another.

While a third wrote: “There’s a lot to address here, but I’ll just say that a decent person doesn’t decide how much respect, effort and love someone else deserves based on how much they weigh.”