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27th Feb 2022

“I’m jealous of how my friend is raising her friend”

Laura Cunningham

“I don’t know what I’m asking really I just needed to vent.”

All parents have their struggles, but have you ever looked at a pal’s setup and thought, they don’t know how lucky they are?

One mother reached out to the online community to confess her feelings towards her friend who, in her eyes, has a lovely life compared to her hectic one.

She told Mumsnet: “My best friend is a single mum to an 8 year old girl. I have 4 children, all boys, and a husband. I love them all dearly and wouldn’t change them for the world but I was round at my friends this morning for a coffee and I can’t help but feel a pit of jealousy when I am with her and her daughter.”

Describing the scene in her pal’s house she said: “Their house is so cosy and girly and they have an amazing relationship, almost ‘banter’. The daughter respects her mum and they genuinely belly laugh together. They’re always spending time together, going days out at the weekend. My friend just seems to have a stress free and enjoyable life.

I love my boys but I have 4 of them and work full time (friend is at uni and supported by her parents) as does my husband, so it’s hard to spend time with them all individually so I guess I don’t have that close close bond I see my friend has with her daughter. All they do is fight and bicker and I have other things to be getting on with at the weekend so days out are few and far between.”

She went on to explain how her friend’s parenting made her feel like she wasn’t doing as good a job herself: “Being in their house this morning, everything is so calm and quiet and happy and she can sit in peace in the kitchen and enjoy her coffee and read her book or just genuinely enjoy her daughters company. I feel like the way she is raising her daughter she is already a lot more mature than her age and I worry I am doing my boys some sort of disservice.”

Her jealousy is even starting to affect her friendship, as she confesses: “It’s making me feel resentment towards my friend. Like when she says she’s stressed with uni work I just want to scream because I’m like you don’t even know the meaning of stress! Her life seems serene.”

Have you ever felt this way about fellow parent friends? Is the grass always greener? Let us know in the comments.