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06th Feb 2024

‘Am I wrong for telling my pregnant wife to work less?’

Anna Martin

When you’re pregnant it’s recommended that you slow down

In fact, the HSE states that you shouldn’t be working more than 40 hours a week.

So most people would be on board if their other half told them it was time to ease their work schedule when expecting.

Yet one husband is having the exact opposite issue with his pregnant wife and he doesn’t know what to do.

Turning to Reddit for advice he wrote, “My wife is pregnant with our first child and is about six or so months along. A piece of information that is potentially relevant to our situation is that I make significantly more than my wife.

pregnant work
Credit: Getty

“My income makes up more than 85 per cent of the household income and we could very easily live off of just my paycheck. Now that being said I have never asked or implied or wanted my wife not to work. I want her to work as much as she wants to work.

“When we were trying to get pregnant she mentioned that she wanted to taper her hours as she got farther into the pregnancy which sounded great. About 3 months into the pregnancy she started getting really fatigued because she was growing a whole other person.”

So he took over doing a majority of the housework and suggested that she would reduce her work hours like she had originally planned.

Instead of doing that, his wife took on more hours becoming stressed and having no time to herself.

“Anytime I ask if she wants to cut back on hours or if she needs a break she gets really upset and goes off about ‘proving she can work’ and not being told what to do,” he continued.

“Finally last week I said ‘I don’t think this is good for you and you should really let yourself have a break.’ I’m not trying to be controlling but I’m genuinely worried about the physical and mental stress she’s been putting herself under for not much additional gain.”

Now he’s working if he’s wrong for trying to get his other half to relax and it seems that his fellow Redditors were on his side.

pregnant work
Credit: Getty

“You’re not wrong but definitely good to be understanding of the hormones, and this could be a ‘financial nesting’ situation.

“Your wife probably feels she needs to do everything she can to make sure she’s financially set for baby, even if it’s irrational.”

Another added, “You expressed concern, but her doubling down on the work seems like an odd reaction. Likely something else causing the behaviour and you need an open and honest discussion about what’s affecting her and making her feel this way.”

“You’re not wrong but why don’t the two of you meet with her doctor? You can each explain your concerns, and the doctor will have impartial advice. Then it won’t be you ‘telling her what to do,'” penned a third.

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