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28th Mar 2024

‘Am I entitled to a key to my daughter’s bedroom door?’

Jody Coffey


It brought the age-old topic of privacy versus safety to light

One parent has sparked a discussion online after they asked the internet if they are entitled to a key for their 19-year-old daughter’s bedroom door.

While their daughter is considered a young adult now, she is still living in her family home where her younger sister could barge in without a moment’s notice.

Understandably, for this reason, she wants to lock her room to protect her privacy as a young woman, leaving her parent fearing the worst-case scenario.

Taking to Reddit, the parent asked:

“My 19-year-old daughter wants to get a lock on her bedroom door to keep her sister out.

“We said fine, as long as we have a key. We don’t normally go in there, but god forbid for emergencies.

“She said she doesn’t have to give us one. Thoughts?”

One fellow parent urged them to stand firm on getting a key to their daughter’s bedroom, detailing horror stories where a family member having access to their room saved their life.

“Yes. I’m an adult who fainted in her place last week. As I came to face down on my kitchen floor in a pool of water I was holding before fainting, all I could think about was getting to my front door to unlock the deadbolt so my mom could come to help me as my 9-month-old was waking up,” the user shared.

“Emergencies happen. Get a key. You may never use it, but it’s a safety precaution.”

Another user made the point that if their daughter was renting elsewhere, her landlord would have a key, so the same should apply while she lives under their roof.

One user said that because the parent owns the house, they are absolutely entitled to a key in case of emergency.

“That emergency could be a water leak, something left on that’s a hazard, a window open needing to be closed, fire, etc.

“And if you have pets & one gets trapped in there unknowingly, it will probably dig the crap out of the floor and/or door. Unless she’s going to pay rent and/or for any damages in those situations…”

Another user believed their daughter was old enough to have control over her own bedroom door, but cleverly suggested the idea of keeping a ‘spare key’ in the house somewhere, rather than a key specifically made for the parent.

They added that ‘she is old enough to have control

“It would be good to have a spare key somewhere, is maybe too late to present it as a “spare key”, instead of thinking of it as your key for her door.

“If you know how [what] I mean, but if she can understand the need for a spare key available somewhere in the house just in case it is needed.”